I Had the Power to Choose – I Still Do

“Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice.” ~Wayne Dyer

I still see that lonely child sitting on the pavement waiting for mom to come from work. Knowing I have a brother and sister near by, still didn’t take the loneliness away.  I had a father who worked away (seaman), and I think that made it worse. I had to make some decisions in my young life to make me see things differently.

What is a daughter to do when you just want your father to love you? Every time my dad came from sea I was so excited because I knew we would have some fish to eat. I knew there would be money in the house. My mom would have money in her purse and she can buy some nice things.

We moved from house to house. Constantly on the move and the thought of ever settling down was endless. I wanted my own room because I had ideas of what my room should look like, but it never happened.

Years later, having a family of my own I thank God for what I’ve gone through. It was not easy at all because I had issues connecting with people.  I had thoughts of every person coming into my life would leave immediately and I would be this lonely person again. Not realising that for everything there is a purpose. You know, if you don’t know Jesus Christ you will never have peace. You will never be filled with that everlasting joy.

So many people have left me by the way side and I do admit it was because of the bad attitude I had. It was because of the lies I kept telling. It was because of all the hurt I’ve caused people. I don’t know if you know this, but when you hurt you will keep on hurting other people. When you no longer hurt, you can serve and love those who are hurting freely.

We all have a choice today. We don’t have to go through life hurting and pitying ourselves. I met Jesus Christ and He has taught me how to let go of the hurt. He has taught me how to love and not to expect anything in return.

A few years back, I met a young woman. What came out of her mouth was so powerful and so true. I would call her an extra ordinary Life Coach. She might not know this but whatever came out of her mouth, was so firm(sometimes hurtful but true). I started writing it down. It was a powerful truth. That was another choice I made. I said to myself, “If it works for her, surely it has to work for me”.  I met a guy and he was speaking the very same things and I knew this is God.

I started writing in a journal every day to get through life and understand myself better. One night I was feeling down, but I wanted to steer my thoughts in a positive direction. I started making a list of things I would learn.

They included things like not dwelling on the negative, loving myself, being confident, and being less critical of myself. In the middle of the list I wrote the words:

“I can choose what affects me.”

By the time I finished the list those words lingered. I repeated them over and over out loud. Every time I said them I felt more powerful. I felt more control over my life.

I can choose what affects me.

I can choose to not be damaged.

I can choose to not be afraid.

I can choose to look at mistakes as learning experiences.

I can choose to be confident.

I can choose to be happy.

I can choose to feel loved.

I can choose.

I CHOOSE TO SERVE JESUS

Every time I said a phrase I felt a chill in my body. Tears started flowing, but I wasn’t really crying. It felt like they were escaping; like I was letting go of this deep sadness I’ve carried for so long.

It was an awakening: a healing. It was one of the most significant and amazing experiences in my life.

In His Love

Leslene

Open Your World to New Possibilities

“To get something you never had, you have to do something you’ve never done.” ~Unknown

Maybe you feel stuck. Or bored. Or frustrated. It’s not that you don’t like the life you live, it’s just that you suspect there’s something more. Some greater sense of meaning or excitement. New connections. New adventures. New possibilities.

The truth is those possibilities are always within your reach. You may not be able to quit your job or develop new skills, but every day contains within it countless opportunities, all dictated by the choices you make. Some of those choices may seem inconsequential when you face them. They’re the little things, after all. Why not do it how you usually do? Why not stay in your comfort zone when it’s just so comfortable there?

Do it for the possibility. The possibility that if you make one minor change you may set the stage for major fulfilment. Sometimes even the smallest shift in thinking or doing can create the biggest opportunity.

GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD

1. Challenge your beliefs about what you can and can’t do. Maybe you are a good leader.

 2. Challenge your ideas about how things should work. Sometimes when you decide how things should be you limit your ability to be effective in the world as it actually is.

3. Have a vision session. Write in a journal,  sketch—anything that lets you explore what excites you most.

4. Look for opportunities in a tough situation. Avoid a victim mentality, and opt instead for a “ready for new beginnings” attitude.

5. Remove something from your life that doesn’t serve you to make room for something better and new. You never know what you might let in when you let something go.

6. Commit to something you always say you’ll do but always fail to start—and then take the first step right now.

7. Turn your focus from something don’t want to something you do want. This allows you to shift your energy from complaining to taking action.

8. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones. Positive energy creates positive results.

9. Identify the blocks that keep you from breaking a bad habit. Anytime you improve your habits, you pave the path for personal excellence.

10. Forgive someone if you’ve been holding a grudge. Removing that block will open you up where previously you’d shut down.

There’s a lot of information here—way more than you can tackle all at once. But it’s more about quality than quantity. Even just one small change can have a ripple effect into every area of your life. Of course it’s up to you to decide what’s possible.

How do you open your world to new possibilities?

Thanks Lori Deschene

In His love

Leslene

In Everything

“The person who lives life fully, glowing with life’s energy, is the person who lives a successful life.” ~Daisaku Ikeda

In everything we do, we seek happiness. Or at least what we think will bring happiness.

But this goal can often get us into trouble. It’s how you find yourself in a career that doesn’t represent you, consuming things lacking real value, and living a life that misses its impact on the world.

Most of the things we think create happiness, don’t.

We get caught in a spiral and life suddenly becomes a race to be won instead of a game to be played and enjoyed. Our focus on ‘success’ as society calls it, blurs our more important intangibles of life–our relationships and experiences.

The fear (and sad reality for many) is that we wake up 30 years from now, stressed, unhealthy and unfulfilled, wondering what on earth happened to those wonderful dreams we once dared to dream.

I’ll tell you what happened. We fell into the trap of being what others felt we should be as opposed to who we were meant to be. Other’s dreams became ours, only to realize they never mattered to us in the first place. We adopted the world’s definition of success instead of understanding and pursing our own.

Well there is good news. No matter when you wake up to this reality, it is never too late to take a stand and travel down that fresh path.

In all of my experience as a friend, writer, husband, personal freedom coach and citizen of the world, there is nothing more consistent with unhappiness than spending your time in a way that doesn’t serve who you are. And to the contrary, there is no more profound source of fulfillment and happiness than knowing you are traveling your own path and making the dent in the world you know you’re capable of.

Thank You -Scott Dinsmore

In His Love

Leslene

The Blame Game

“Whenever something negative happens to you, there is a deep lesson concealed within it.” ~Eckhart Tolle

The most common conversation I have with other people includes the blame game.

The one where your job, your wife, your dog, your mother-in-law, your neighbor six doors down, the media, the government, the receptionist at your doctor’s office, or the dress maker who measured you wrong is somehow responsible for the problems you’re having.

I too played the blame game.

Just this morning I blamed my husband for something I could’ve prevented.

I sat down, took a long deep breath, and thought about the ways I’d contributed to my own unhappiness. Once I came up with one way, countless others seemed to follow.

In that moment, I realized I was blatantly ignoring vital life lessons.

I believe we are here to learn lessons. Once we learn a lesson we move on to the next lesson. However, if we fail to learn a lesson, we keep finding opportunities to learn it again and again.

Isn’t it weird that the woman who can’t leave her old unhappy relationship without starting a new one is always in an unhappy relationship? Or the man who quits his job because he can’t stand his overbearing and ungrateful boss lands a new job with a boss who seems even more overbearing and ungrateful?

Life will continue to throw us the same lessons until we learn from them. Here are some ways to start learning that lesson you may be resisting:

1. Believe there is a lesson to be learned and consent to learn it.

This is probably one of the most important steps. Unless you’re really willing to learn the lesson, even if it feels uncomfortable at times, you can never move forward. Consent to view the situation as something that can help you grow.

2. Admit that you might have helped create the problem.

Warning: This does require you to immediately quit playing the blame game! Just consider the possibility that you somehow contributed to your current situation. This doesn’t mean no one else played a part; it just means perhaps you did, as well.

4. Let go of your attachment to the problem.

Trying to control the problem—your boss, your spouse, or your circumstances—will only keep you more attached to it and. The more you “leech” onto a problem, the more it “leeches” right back on you.

You will never be able to see the lesson or the solution if you dwell on all the little details about what seems wrong. Letting go could come in many forms: seeing the good in the person who seems difficult, accepting a situation for what it is, or seeing the other side of the story.

Any time we let go of our attachment to what went wrong or what should have happened we create the possibility of growth—and we pave the path for more positive results.

Thank you Rachel Woods

In His Love

Leslene

Coming Back

This is a post I’ve been dreaming about for a very long and it can finally be written. “Commit your works to God and your plans will be established.” Proverbs 16:3 was the scripture I was and still is holding on to. There are so many promises in the Bible but we’re not taking hold of it. When we do take hold of it we do it in the flesh.

My sister had this mind set that she was not a backslider, but to me her actions said something different. Don’t get me wrong, I am not this perfect Christian girl who has it all figured out. I have so many flaws but I am very quick to repent. I have a desire to change many lives by not doing good works (Isaiah 64:6), but by doing the right and honest works.

There are many people who can help me with CLAY, but I choose my sisters and my brother. I choose my husband, my sister’s husbands, my brother’s future wife, our kids and the generations to come. We have a story to tell. We have a message for the world. We are a people with a messy past, a bright future and God who delivers us from our affliction.

My eldest sister recommitted her life to Christ. It happened after I asked her to help me in ministry. I know when I posed the question she felt that she was not in line with God’s plan for her life. At the Conference where Todd Bentley was preaching she opened up her heart to Jesus Christ. On our way home she could then freely speak about CLAY and how she would like to help.

She was once again freed from the chains holding her down. The Power of God has broken the chain in Jesus name. There is so much I want to do and is happening already, but I have to continuously place God in the driver seat. My husband and kids are excited for what God is doing. One by one my family’s lives are changed and soon we’ll all be apart of CLAY to go out there, make a difference by being the change and spreading the Good News of Jesus Christ.

We are here NOT to look down on you, but to lift you up. We are here NOT to break you down but to help you tear the walls down.

We are here to LOVE you because Jesus loved you first. We are here to share in your weakness where His strength will be made perfect. We are here to tell you that it is time for CHANGE and we are here to show you how.

It is time to COME BACK and taste the goodness of God once again.

In is love

Leslene

Two Way Conversation

What does people want more of in life? Or let me ask, “What does a friend long for in life?”

A friend longs to be heard when life comes crashing down.

Good friendships improve all aspects of your life, providing comfort, joy, strengthening your health, providing companionship and prevent isolation. Not all people can keep themselves from isolating themselves. They need someone to help them.

When I think of my life and how friends have come and gone, it makes me sad. I’m asking myself, “have you not done enough to prevent the friendship from ending?”

Then Jesus comes and assures me that I have done enough. That season has ended. I have put in so much but the effort was not appreciated. There were times when I was so lonely; I would then go into isolation. I would create a pit and then throw myself into it. I would see my friend go on girly dates with other people and it would hurt my feelings and I would sink even deeper. I got myself out of that pit when I realised something. I read a quote of Dr Cindy Trimm which stuck to me since that day. “Loneliness is not the absence of people, but the absence of PURPOSE. When you have purpose, the right people will come.”

I have found my purpose. I have learned to equip myself in the lonely times. I can now equip others through their lonely moments. Every person I meet in this lifetime is my assignment. I don’t have to worry about being dumped by a friend, I can move on when the assignment is over. I don’t have to worry about girly dates and how hurt I feel when I’m not invited. The assignment NOW is to focus on the ones who hurt. My girly dates will come when it is God ordained.

Today, I know a friend when I have one. That friend is sometimes so hard to define because of stuff that person has gone through.

I ones was so hurt but not because of a friend and I got a bbm message from a lady. I wanted to share my hurt but God stopped me when she said, “I am only a bb away if you need me” My response was, “Every one is a bb away, and I don’t need that.”

I am a person who picks up the phone and ask how you doing. I am a person who will go to your house unexpectedly to give my support. Whether it is in serving you, encourage you or just pray with you.

Technology may have shifted the definition of friend in recent years, but having hundreds of online friend is not the same as having a friend you can connect and be in person with. You make new friends via the new technology yes, but it CANNOT hug you or cry with you when you need them the most.  Friends sharpens one another’s countenance (Proverbs 27:17).

Our survival ones depended on having friends. Yes they add special memories and hurtful memories which can only make you strong, but when you have Jesus Christ it all changes. He takes that void and fills it with purpose.

Off course friendship is a two way street. It brings joy to your life. When the one is quiet, it is understood. When everyone else leaves, a friend stays behind.

My prayer for you is to be patient. To love at all times. To serve at all times and that you will know, you DO NOT have to be the friend who constantly have to prove yourself. Be the friend you would want a friend to be to you.

In His love

Leslene